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Writer's pictureAJ Theolade

OM isn't sex


Although many of us came to OM to address dissatisfaction in our sex lives and ultimately learned the tools that led to a more satisfying experience of physical intimacy, the OM practice itself is not sex.


While OM can be considered sexual in nature, the absence of a goal or any expectation of how it’s going to feel are just the beginning of why it wouldn’t be considered sex. Male nudity isn’t part of the practice nor genital-to-genital contact. Both partners agree that they are there to have the experience as is, and nothing extra.


When we first began to OM we may not have known how to classify the experience. But soon we discovered that there were a variety of things about its spirit and form that made it possible to expand beyond where we were and get closer to where we wanted to be - and not just sexually, but in other areas of our lives too, including our health, happiness, and relationships.


We found, for instance, that the OM container itself allowed us to safely have the experience of letting go.


Simply there to experience, and not to give or get anything in return, freed us to feel - an ability that deepened when we discovered the surrender possible in participating in a goalless practice!


We strengthened our understanding of what it means to have integrity by committing to keeping the structure of OM - starting and stopping with the timer and following the steps as laid out in the container document.


Accepting that our practice would trigger our shame and guilt from our conditioned sexuality and past experiences, we learned to use OM as a way to heal, and over time to separate the sensations we feel in our bodies from the stories we had come to attach them.


Through OM, we discovered a new freedom to be in and enjoy our bodies. And while that might sound like sex, we know, it isn’t!


(Reading from the weekly International OM community iOM meeting - Wed 27th May, 2020)

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